Sunday, January 30, 2011


I know that you will find this hard to believe, but I am not on Facebook.  Call me crazy, but I keep up with all of the people that I really care about and love when we are together and they unexpectedly share a photo with me.  When my friends get married, I attend the festivities.  When they go on vacation (and I don't go with them) I ask them about their adventures.  When they have cute little babies, I visit and take my own pictures.  I am really not interested in their shopping, cleaning, cooking, or bathroom habits.  Plus, if someone was ever to "defriend" me, I might have a hard time with that.  So instead, I blog and friends that are interested in what I think, not what I do, check in.

It is hard, however, to visit with my friends and family and not hear about the latest post on Facebook and this one just supports that fact that I never will be a part of that social media. 

Apparently there has been a lot of chatter lately about cancer on Facebook.  Not surprising because according to the American Cancer Society more than 11.7 million people were battling the disease in 2007.  Athletes wear pink in support, consumers buy products with pink ribbons in support, and people (including myself) walk, run, and donate time and money in support of this horrible disease.  Cancer is in the media, on TV, and mentioned on Facebook because it affects people's lives. 

On old friend of my sister, let's call her Peter, saw these posts and felt compelled to comment.  Her comment however, was about how alcoholism is also a disease and why should we focus so much on cancer when people like her are suffering from the effects of alcohol.  WHAT?

I have seen the effects that alcohol can have on a person and feel for those that have to live with someone that chooses alcohol over them on a daily basis.  But the fact is, though a disease, an alcoholic chooses to start drinking.  They choose to continue drinking because they like the way it tastes or makes them feel.  It becomes a habit and an addiction and takes tremendous strength to overcome.  But they can choose to "cure" themselves; get help and stop drinking.

Cancer patients don't choose which cells metastasize.  They don't undergo chemotherapy because it tastes good.  And they certainly don't begin radiation therapy because they like the way it makes them feel.  They can't put down their hospital gown and simply walk away from cancer. 

That, Peter, is why people talk about cancer. And why it is very hard for me to feel sorry for you, on Facebook or not.


  1. I saw Peter's post but missed the fall-out because of it - she ended up removing it. I'll have to catch up on what everyone posted about it!

    Anyway I agree completely with everything you wrote BUT I do need to give my 2 cents about Facebook. About 6 months ago I felt the SAME EXACT way you did about Facebook. At one point I actually loathed the site when I was, as I say, a Facebook victim - when someone announced my 2nd pregnancy without my permission.

    When I was on maternity leave and then had back surgery - I ended up getting an account out of boredom. AND - I admit, I absolutely LOVE IT!

    First of all - my family is from Rochester. I can post pictures of my girls and it makes my Mom and Aunts feel like they aren't missing out on seeing them grow.

    Secondly - I like to use Facebook to put up fun statuses that I hope are inspirational to people. I know that sounds corny - but I've had many people tell me that my statuses make them laugh, or inspire them to work-out, or take a class. I do on Facebook what you do on your blog - but I do it with less characters. I like to make clever quips about the funny little things in life. I like to share my perspective with people because I like to think that I can make someone smile just by sharing my crazy thoughts.

    Finally - I agree completely with you about people who put up status that are dumb, or TMI - so I am very selective about who I'm friends with. I can honestly say that everyone who I'm friends with I have their phone numbers in my phone. If someone's posts annoy me - I delete or hide them. I don't care. I've deleted people and I make no apologies. It's MY Facebook and I decide what I want to read.

    A few other things and then I'll end this short novel ;-)

    Facebook is basically becoming the Internet. Retailers are always using Facebook to create a following by offering sales/discounts. Every website has a Facebook icon that you can "like" the website, or an article, or whatnot. While I COMPLETELY understand you're reasoning for not wanting a Facebook - I urge you to try it. I think you will be surprised at the enjoyment that you may get out of it. If it annoys you and you find that you are not as personally interactive with those in your life that you want to be, than just delete your account - it's only a few mouse clicks back to normalcy.

    Blog on my friend!

  2. I agree with Jenn O. I wasn't on face book for the longest time. I am on now. I am starting to loathe it. I just have it so I can post pictures of my beautiful daughter.. yes I am biased she is beautiful.. And I dont' know this "Peter" but REALLY!!!!!!